Nerd Rant

wheeeeeeee

2008-09-13T20:00:00.002+05:30

shifting to a new blog, temporarily/permanently..not sure...maybe

this one - http://sharanx182.vox.com/

the norms that normally piss me off

2008-08-31T12:14:00.002+05:30

list of societal norms that will always haunt me, and piss me off:-

chivalry - yet another thing my fellow man does to make my fellow woman feel special momentarily, it's all because he wants to get laid...

confidence - why should i be confident? i do not want to be the person who 'charms' and 'awes' people...I'd rather be the guy who you can easily ignore....ok so i may be a little 'funny' sometimes, but that has NOTHING to do with confidence...i crack jokes for myself, not for everyone else...they turn out to be good sometimes...it's only because im not too bad at expressing myself in the English language whenever i feel comfortable enough to, and some humor/sarcasm/childishness shines through and you people find it amusing. i would never ask a person to be 'confident', it's something these coaching classes and self help books will always ask you to be...but guess what? you CAN survive with low self esteem and low levels of confidence in this world...and you don't even have to worry about 'keeping it up' for the world :) what you call 'confident' for me is 'oblivious', 'confident' people want to charm you, oblivious people, don't give a rat's ass whether you're charmed or disgusted...and it's better this way...you have to interact less on a personal level...

Leadership - why god WHY are we expected to 'take control' of the situation? is leadership that important a trait? in a situation where it's required, you NEED some people to be 'led' too...all these management jobs, they want you to be able to motivate people, to be able to lead them, that's just horrible!! i don't want to motivate people, i don't want to lead them, i want to be in a situation where the only person i affect and instruct is myself...people are volatile factors, i hate them anyway...and to have to make them see my view just sucks...every leader is an asshole...

patriotism - it is the most bullshit, farce feeling created by man ever. why should i feel proud of the marked out piece of land some men decided to call my 'country'?? and why should i be willing to sacrifice stuff for this piece of land??? people want us to be thankful for the 'freedom' our forefathers fought for...can't you see?? we have had the freedom to speak, and do whatever we want, since the day we were born!! he have a tongue, we have hands...that's all we need...our freedom is only restricted by our 'country' and it's government!! a man should be able to go into the jungle, and just survive, like our REAL forefathers...the tribals did, right now you can't even own a piece of land in the jungle without asking your bloody government...

i'll add more if i can think of any...

crappy message histories...

2008-08-27T22:31:00.001+05:30

coming across old text messages
makes me want to puke
makes it hard to breathe...
what you said in them,
the words couldn't be sweeter
but they do become more painful at every viewing without failure.

how can we kiss without wanting it again?
how can we hug without not wanting to separate?
how can your head lay there on my chest...
without feeling a comfort everlasting?
how can your laughter not mean you're happy?

"i'll never be the same,
yeah...I'll never be the same again..." Note:- these particular lines have been stolen, from the following song:-

----------------
Now playing: The Honorary Title - Only One Week
via FoxyTunes

this song is like something i wrote in my sleep, except that i can't write, bleh...wish i could. it's such an attractive quality. one that men use to portray so many lies, i wouldn't though...although, now that i think of it...im happy i can't write poetry or prose or anything very well, because i believe that the ability to write well makes you deceitful.if you can write the stories of fictional characters, you tend to weave some of the 'fiction' in your own lives to screw with people's brains (e.g seduction, serenading)...ugh...that's why i hate male writers, except the humorous ones...I'd rather write the truth about myself and the world in the form of un-beautiful mediocre text.

lyrics of 'only one week':-

Have your lips graced another's yet or am I the only one?
Every time I try to speak to you, those are the thoughts that run
Say something else girl, I don't wanna have to leave
Our communication is hardly what it used to be

When can I claim you to be
My own, so selfishly?
When can I claim you to be
My own, my only?

Want nothing more than our futures to collide
Can't tell this is gonna be one of many disappointing nights
Traces of you are so minimal
A black and white by photo booth with us

When can I claim you to be
My own, so selfishly?
When can I claim you to be
My own, my only?

And I have only one week to make you mine
And I may never see you again
It's not only for me, it's not only for me
There's a little bit, little bit here for you
But I'm willing to wait, I'm willing

Day time is no longer the hours spent
[Incomprehensible] rather the hours to obsess
And the night is far worse
'Cause I know you're alone with her
And thoughts of, of us have been deserted

It will never be the same
I'll never be the same again
I will never be the same again

I have only one week to make you mine
And I may never see you again
Time is few and far between
There is someone else who needs
There is someone else who needs your attention
But I'm willing to wait, I am willing to wait
I'm willing to wait, I'm willing to wait

the log blog experiment...

2008-08-25T15:06:00.011+05:30

yesterday (sunday august 24th 2008), i carried a notebook around with me, loggign my day and stupid thoughts...now im putting it all here:-

log start - 1:16 p.m, place - coffee stop/cheap xerox place, model colony, pune

when I've got my headphones on, communication with people seems like an avoidable unnecessary thing, it's like 'let's get it over with'

now playing - coldplay - violet hill

*moves foot to the beats*

the clouds look pretty kickass today. the sun is just a little higher than 'just right', actually it just turned to much higher that that!! argh!! need shade!! now im just sitting around waiting for some 'xeroxes' for tomorrow's exam to come around listening to people talk about what they've eaten since morning

log stop 1:32 p.m

log start 2:19 p.m, place - bench opposite spencer's, model colony

just had a heavy lunch, alone, have been walking around to make stressed out tummy feel better, walked the length of one 'nude' by 'Radiohead'

Now playing- Oasis - Supersonic

sitting on the benches across spencer's in model colony (hey they mention 'yellow submarine' in the lyrics!!) The clouds still look kickass, except for this little menacing bunch of dark ones in a corner, but i don't fear them, they 'menaced' yesterday too, and it didn't rain at all yesterday :) this bench is nice! also an awesome breeze has somehow started blowing, im contemplating going up to dhriv's terrace...*looks up to the terrace* bleh, too much of a climb...

i have the phrase -
'our weapon, is sound,
our weapons are loud'

stuck in my head!! i love shaair and func, what lovely people!!love every word of the lyrics and the things they say, YEAH!!

Now playing - The Beatles - If i fell (in love with you)

Monica is an amazing creature, what kickass people!! now, SOHO's management are choots, this gig should have been in the SOHO's 'club' area, where people dance, not int eh 'Italian restaurant' area! advertised as 'livealive: a night of fusion and jazz' when did anyone allow you to to genre0lize shaair and func? and so wrong-ish! People probably expected a 'dinner band' which they obviously aren't

Now playing - Yeah Yeah Yeahs - They don't love you like i love you

i'm floored by Snf, they had been mentioned to me before, i wanted to get my hands on some of their music, and then i find out they're playing in pune through gigpad.com, yay!! i had been listening to their tracks streaming from their website some hours before the gig-time, while showering, (well, i didn't actually shower, the water was cold)..erm...but i did loaf around my house, picking things up, listening to their music again, lovely, lovely lyrics.

Now playing - Jack johnson - What you thought you need

I feel like apologizing for the sad crowd, but they were pretty misinformed. Damn they shouls have thrown you people into the club, damn damn damn!! the 'dancing' crowd would have been hit with you like a grenade!! (sorry will smith) and i jsut got a call from a friend who's intrigued about the fact that i parked my bke in front of her house and didn't come to visit...bleh...social obligations, being social is so not necessary.

Now Playing - The beatles - Lucy in the sky with diamonds

People and their needs always slow you down when you're just 'socializing' for the sake of it
.......long pause........
this is pretty stupid, im going to sleep.
log stop 2:44 p.m

log start 3:25 p.m, place - Garima's house

Now Playing - The Beatles - Hey jude

woken up by the burning sun, whew. Ah, there it goes behind some nice nice clouds, i gonna go now
......long pause.......
now im just sitting at Garima's place, whew, can't think, can't write, can't sleep.

log stop 3:40 p.m

log start 3:47 p.m, still at Garima's place

im now lying on Garima's bed, she's on a video call with some guy, i have my music on, i could eavesdrop if i wanted but bleh...let it be...i want shaair and func's music!! and i want it now!! waaaaah!! my fingers and the back of this pen constantly keep beating on the notebook to the beat of the song im listening to :)

Now Playing - Joseph Arthur - Honey and the moon
........long pause coz kanika suddenly called on my phone...
log stop 4:11 p.m

rantings on possessions, sweet girls, and retards...(actual retards, not my friends)...

2008-08-09T14:34:00.000+05:30

the things you own, end up owning you... - Tyler durden

being able to walk around town without any worries is bloody liberating, i almost wish i didn't have insurance for my possessions!!

she...is the sweetest thing ever...(ooh the pixies sound so much like the Beatles sometimes!!) like this liqueur chocolate with extra strong liqueur, that is intoxicating enough to make you not care about all the other shit in the world, her company makes you wanna kick the starving kids in Africa to death because they just don't seem important (i never cared too much about them anyway)

speaking of kids, i went to this 'retard meeting place' recently, some of my friends like to go there and meet them and be all nice and they keep saying "they're so sweet!!" etc etc, why the hell do you wanna do that? i mean, seriously, i was freaked out!! these people are not that developed mentally, but look at their lives, (and this thought has been put into my head by a fictional character, one Gregory house) they don't have to be nice to everyone, they don't have to learn to say the right thing at the right time, they don't have to adhere to social formalities, any mistake they make is a 'adorable', people like to say 'it's so sad how unfortunate they are' they're bloody fortunate!! to live a life without judgment!! they can crap in their pants and they'll be helped out and not mocked...and yeah i think it's just wrong to be giving the retards 'special treatment', they're human after all, however childish they may be, they're still assholes on the inside like any of us...their assholeness is just taken as 'adorable activities', if i spit on somebody it'd start a feud, these guys get laughter and sweetness, bleh...

it's hard juggling blogs, random rants sometimes jsut end up turning into redable material!! (kinda..hehe)

this was originally neing written only for http://angadrandom.blogspot.com/ but here it is, on the other one too (http://sharanx182.blogspot.com)

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Now playing: Pixies - Here Comes Your Man
via FoxyTunes

change is inevitable...

2008-08-09T12:43:00.003+05:30

many times in literature and the throes of cheesy dialogue do we hear the lines "if he/she loves you, he/she should take you as you are" (we're gonna stick with 'she' now, it's easier) i.e a person would say to you "i wouldn't change a thing in you" or "i don't want you to have to change for me, it isn't right"

come on, who are you kidding? nobody's perfect (cliched, but true) if you're with somebody, there are some habits or behavioral patterns that you definitely would like to change...although you learn to live with every bit of these things, given a choice, you'd change a lot...and now let's look at the other side, if you really care for someone you'd want to change for them yourself!! ideally, i don't like keeping my house clean or shirts folded or ironed or anything, im just lazy, but if somebody i care for would be happy if i did, i would!! we humans enjoy making other humans close to us happy...unconditional or otherwise, I'd be happy to see you happy, you'd be my reason to fold my shirts, because let's face it, folding shirts is, good for me too, i know that...but i can live without doing that...but when i know im being asked to because im cared for, it feels nice :) every shirt folded, every bed made, every bit of the house kept clean...would make you feel nice when you do it, because you know that this change matters...a man in love, would do anything to make his interest happy, and these are all just metaphors and/or examples...change, is very welcome if it is for someone you love...of course that doesn't mean i transform into this prim and proper gentleman, we don't want a transformation, we just want you to care for us to tweak ourselves :) im dying to change...kinda...ok that doesn't make much sense...

men will be truly men only without women...and neither of the two 'positions' are comparable...except that we have the option to 'drop out' of a relationship :-P (though nobody would do that to be a 'man' again unless they have a truly intolerable woman)

im talking about something very typical...not all women and men can identify with this situation...it's a point of view over a fictional story...something made up...something which actually follows certain norms, hmmmmm....im so tempted to contradict myself right now!! but for that you need the example of 'the perfect woman'...agh...all women, however 'liberal' or 'chilled out' have some common unavoidable traits...it's ok, we do like women for those :)

a quote, totally contradictory:-

when asked about marriage:- "we're a generation of men raised by women, I'm wondering if another woman is really the answer we need" - Tyler Durden

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Now playing: Frou Frou - Breathe In
via FoxyTunes

this doesn't need a title...i don't wanna give it one!!

2008-07-22T20:23:00.002+05:30

spending even a penny on religious artifacts is the worst form of asskissing ever, also you're kissing the ass of an inanimate person...you're like, licking the ass of..er...god! why do these idiots spend money on making gold idols to worship?? like god is gonna come and say-

"oooooooh is that me? how cool i look in the form of that gold statue of myself!! im gonna drop a shitload of cash on you as a form of a return on your investment coz you're giving me so much superficial happiness!! i really need to be made more famous!! it's like the micheal jackson statue!! how cool!! i feel so kickass!! im popular!! yay!! good that you did that..i was gonna hurt you and your family...coz i was feeling depressed and unloved...some of the other people on that thing i made, what was that? earth..yeah..seem to not like me too much!! about 1 or 2%, im gonna fucking smite them!! yeah use that metal i created..gold..to make copies of me in the form that you think i look like :) im so happy!! yay!!"

you guys suck!! you only spend money on expensive 'god' items coz you want your friends to know how much money you have!!

in other news, e-square ruined my viewing of 'the dark knight' coz of their crappy sound...but i enjoyed it in adlabs today :)

random things i wanna say:-

-giving up is liberation

-the joker, from 'the dark knight'...is my favorite fictional character right now...

also i was just browsing for lyrics on songmeanings.com , posted under the lyrics to 'Your own disaster' by 'taking back sunday' were some really, really relatable personal experiences by people...it is just..so...heartbreaking!! i never thought i'd use this word but it all is!! the lyrics are these:-

Just think of this and me
as just a few of many things
to lie around, to clutter up your shelves
And I wish you weren't worth the wait
cause there's something's I'd like to say to you

And I don't think that you know what you've been missing
Cause I don't think that you know what you've been missing

And I dare you to forget
the marks you left across my neck
from those nights when we were both found at our best
Now I could make this obvious and you
you could deny me all in one breath
you could shrug me off your shoulders

And I don't think that you know what you've been missing
Cause I don't think that you know what you've been missing
And I don't think that you know,
I said I don't think you know,
I said I don't think that you know what you've been missing

Hey lush, have fun, it's the weekend
Hey lush, have fun
Hey lush, have fun, it's the weekend
Hey lush, have fun

(oh I don't think that you know what you've been missing)
Hey lush, have fun, it's the weekend
(no I don't think that you know what you've been missing)
Hey lush, have fun
(oh I don't think that you know what you've been missing)
Hey lush, have fun, it's the weekend
(no I don't think that you know what you've been missing)
Hey lush, have fun (just forget me, it's that simple)

(oh I don't think that you know what you've been missing)
Hey lush, have fun, it's the weekend
(just forget me, it's that simple)
(no I don't think that you know what you've been missing)
Hey lush, have fun
(just forget me, it's that simple)

Just forget me, it's that simple [11x]

(oh I don't think that you know what you've been missing)
Hey lush, have fun, it's the weekend
(just forget me, it's that simple)
(no I don't think that you know what you've been missing)
Hey lush, have fun
(just forget me, it's that simple)

(oh I don't think that you know what you've been missing)
(no I don't think that you know what you've been missing)

Just forget me it's that simple

and this is where this all was happening:-
http://www.songmeanings.net/lyric.php?lid=143779

some girl/guy posted in the comments:-
"you could deny me, all in one breath you could shrug me off your shoulders" :*(

yeah that's my favorite (can this word actually be used to describe the situation?) line from the song too...er...random person :)

sometimes instead of talking...i could just recite lyrics...some of them speak so bloody well for me!!

i hate my life...

a usb 3.0 emotions transfer device might be useful right now...coz i really think that saying it is better than saying nothing at all...that device would prolly give one the feeling of "it's all up in the air, and we stand still to see what comes down", at least it's 'all' up in the air :) this line is from the fray's 'she is'...and yeah if you're unclear about the 'emotion transfer device' refer to this:-

http://sharanx182.blogspot.com/2007/11/usb-30-emotion-speed-transfer-review.html

although i feel differently about the post now...pretty different..i think I'd see the girl in a very different light if i knew that she likes me in the same manner that i like...er...my interest :)

'taking back sunday' is an amazing band....wow...

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Now playing: Taking Back Sunday - One-Eighty By Summer
via FoxyTunes

technology may not be perfect, but it sure beats a wig full of angry bunnies

2008-06-11T07:54:00.001+05:30

i saw this 'sheep in the big city' episode recently...

it was basically about technology kicking sheep's ass in the big city, all kinds of shitty luck...and then he somehow goes back into time using a time machine (the show is very weird) and he finds happiness, he's somewhere in ancient greece or something...and there are these people who are really nice to him, he's having the time of his life!! no technology to bother him!! but then he realizes that those people are making him happy happy coz 'lady medusington' likes her 'sacrifices' to be kept happy...now, this delightful woman, is lady medusington:-

and her wig full of angry bunnies!! (obviously this is a satire of medusa, the mythical character who had snakes for hair) :-

ow, lady medusington throws her wig on sheep to attack him, the wig keeps bouncing up and down on him, hurting him!! poor sheep....

then he gets an idea, he takes out some seeds:-

buries and waters them:-

instantly, carrots grow!!:-

he hands them to the angry bunnies, and they're happy and leave him alone :) so cute!! hehe....

so this made me laugh like a crazy guy for a long time :-P you have to see this episode!! you have to worship the chow creators!! the show is so...damn...funny!!! buahahahahahahahahahahaha!! :-P

and yeah, after sheep does this, we get to hear lady medusington saying lines like "you ruined my angry bunnies!!!" (with a heavily rolling 'r', arrrr)

and

"i'll get you, you bunny ruiner!!"

heeheeheehee....

2008-05-28T22:19:00.003+05:30

our country definitely needs a 'common sense committee', the members of which should be elected by people with the highest education levels/awards/whatever in the age range of 18-25, and...the members should be outsourced, rich and sarcastic. and very, very emotionless and...um...yeah something like that.

bleh...and yeah the committees decisions should be final and all powerful.

'the notebook'??!!??

2008-05-23T05:19:00.000+05:30

i just saw 'the notebook', and to be honest, i don't know what to say...

it wasn't as bad as so many human males told me (except one, this strange guy at WNS,hehe)
but it wasn't as good as so many human females told me...

now, i might have liked it if i didn't find it that predictable, and i found it predictable because i had seen this hindi movie "u, me aur hum", which has totally ripped off the concept and i had heard about this... (now i feel guilty for saying 'ripped off' because i liked the movie, the hindi one, except the first one hour)

whatever, watching the hindi...um...'similar concept movie' ruined my experience of watching the original....kinda...i liked it, but could have liked it better if i hadn't come across the concept before...and as most hindi movies somehow manage (fake bastards) they made the ending a bit happier :-P

so...as a result...i came out after watching the hindi movie with a 'warm fuzzy feeling', that feeling, maybe, could have belonged to 'the notebook' had i seen it before!! but would the hindi one still succeed in the same?? ARRGHHH!! im just pissed...but 'the notebook' wasn't bad...not bad at all...and im being generous here...im happy i got this bit of curiosity off my chest...

MP3

2008-05-17T02:47:00.007+05:30

im doing something which i thought would be pretty fun to do :-P

currently watching this movie called MP3 (mera pehla pehla pyar), in VLC player behind this window, i've just paused the movie..taking abreak...and im gonna be logging my views as i watch it :)

im at this point in the movie:- 0:45:04

at this point these two kids (teenagers) are looking at each other standing in the rain...with a song playing in the background..

the movie has been pretty enjoyable up till now, very relatable because of the way the main character introduces his friends, the stereotypes, which are very recognizable!! :-P only thing that has ticked me off up till now is that pathetic little song they threw in that his friend's sang for him, wtf? it's been pretty funny too, the movie :)

note: i seriously don't have anythign else to watch, but this aint too bad up till now!!

ok...now im gonna watch the movie...
ciao... (wait for updates)

now,
im at this point in the movie:- 0:50:48

what the FUCK is wrong with this movie?? couldn't the script writers come up with a better reason for a fight? god!!!

now,
im at this point in the movie:- 0:59:00

though the time doesn't matter, fuck this girl is HOT/cute in a way very different from all these typical movie stars/models :-P very good casting!! very believable looking actors :)

now,
im at this point in the movie:- 1:01:11

in the squash court,fakest laugh, EVER!!

watching the credits now...

it was, a pretty entertaining movie, not too bad to pass the night away :) and i kinda liked the title track...bleh...

although it was kinda predictable around the end...the plot was stupid too now that i think of it...hmmmm...whatever...

their chemistry is kinda weird, these two...hehe

i feel like such an idiot now to have dedicated a whole blog post to this movie....

also one more thing, i can't beleive they were able to conjure up only 7,000 for him!! after this movie released, i sold my old 40 gb monochrome iPod for 8,000 to a guy, heehee...so these people in the movie are pretty pathetic salesmen :)

also in this frame, she looks like rachel bilson!!:-

why facebook is depressing....

2008-04-26T03:00:00.000+05:30

this is from some weird application...

Note:- a few days ago the count for people who said 'yes' was 0, the '1' kinda kills the humor now...bleh...and the effect...agh!!

2008-04-10T21:15:00.001+05:30

box car racer (cat like thief):-
Cat like thief she stole air from my lungs
Leave me standing on this lonely grave
I dug it out in case she turns away

angels and airwaves (the adventure):-
Any type of love it will be shown
Like every single tree reach for the sky
If you`re gonna to fall
I'll let you know
That I will pick you up
Like you for I

blink 182 (going away to college):-
Why does it feel the same
To fall in love or break it off
And if young love is just a game
Then I must have missed the kick off
Dont depend on me to ever follow through on anything
But Id go through hell for you and

I havent been this scared in a long time
And Im so unprepared so heres your valentine
Bouquet of clumsy words, a simple melody
This worlds an ugly place
But youre so beautiful to me

plus 44 (little death):-
Please, sleep my darling, sleep
Your car crash in slow motion
Won't upset the pace on distant stars
And one by one the years of our lives
Stumble as the moments pass
So please hold on, so please hold on

So fall asleep with the windows open
Come to me with the worst you've said and done
You'll close your eyes and see me
A little death makes life more meaningful
I stand no chance at all

just excerpts from the various bands formed here and there by mark tom and travis...
i don't know what anyone would make of the last one, 'little death', look at these for an insight and believe what you want:-
http://www.songmeanings.net/lyric.php?lid=3530822107858627535
http://www.songmeanings.net/lyric.php?lid=3530822107858634590

i won't say all of these are my favorite lyrics from all their songs...they're just the ones that struck me in this moment :)

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Now playing: Sugar Ray - Someday
via FoxyTunes

im just a happy kid, stuck with the heart of a sad punk...

2008-02-27T23:28:00.003+05:30

ironically, one of the most depressing songs I've heard is 'Happy kid' by 'nada surf'...

again, when i decided to write a new blog post, i thought of writing about all the movies i recently saw (sleepless in Seattle, juno etc) and the music i heard (juno soundtrack, this song by never ending white lights) and again i thought, enh...who wants to go through all that effort, now it just seems like effort, earlier i just wanted to get my opinion on every damn thing out to the world...

i've noticed that i HATE people singing along to music instinctively, (most people, some people, i like when they sing alon :) ) although i do it with anything I've heard...for example, i make it a point to not play songs by hinder etc when there a lot of people around (specially women, ugh, they all seem to be crazy about hinder and nickleback) because if i do...everyone starts singing along!! so i try to play songs which are likeable, but which nobody has heard....

yeah i think that's all that my mind could come up with today...

oh yeah i was listening to this song in which a line goes:-
"I spend more time in front of mirrors
Than any gent should"

and this reminded me of all the people at my gym, who (this they do as if there's no one in the room) look at themselves in the large mirror/wall at different angles, making different poses (in their underwear) even different expressions!! now, generally, all of us look at ourselves in the mirror...but i, disgusted my the sheer vanity of all this gym shit, don't feel like looking at myself in the mirror anymore!! bleh...it's like 'eeyuch'...why!!??

ok im done.

oh and i also realized that nine inch nails are the wisest band out there, listen to 'march of the pigs' and 'starfuckers inc.' to get a drift of what i mean...

i feel so fucking loved....shit.

2008-02-03T00:58:00.000+05:30

"oh yes im fine, everything's just wonderful, im having the time of my life"

for the not very bright...yes, that is sarcasm.

it's like i have permanent blogger's block, earlier if anything out of the ordinary (or even very ordinary) happened in my life, id write about it...at a time i'd only write about all the unfair things in life...try to make my writing interesting, in this one..im just trying to bloody make the content look different from my previous posts, to avoid myself from getting bored of it...bah.

now things i could talk about:-
-the flooding of my apartment
-the awesome split uplugged concert i attended, and how different it was (i would put the word 'different' in quotes, but it'd look like i was disrespecting split, and i don't wanna do that :) )
-mood indigo, and the ride to bombay, also the mahabaleshwar ride...
-new friends here and there
-anleey's cat giving birth to dead babies and eating them

now, why i wouldn't write about the above things:-

what the fuck do you (the reader) care about he flooding of my apartment? happens to many people...someone leaves a tap on...shit happens...bollocks. the concert now, i've written about so many concerts in the past, i don't really care if anyone else enjoys my view of the music or not, i don't wanna waste my time putting a visual image of a concert in the readers mind, go get your tickets, and attend it yourself...i enjoyed it, so could've you...again, shit happens. now the ride, once again, way too many rides in history, you wanna feel what i felt? take your bike and ride along...me telling you 'how fast i went on those awesome roads' doesn't interest me...and is useless for you too...you'll never understand it until you do it...

now the 'new friends', the definition of a friend nowadays doesn't go beyond having somebody's phone number....so i'd say, realistically, that i have 'potential new friends', what would i write about them? bloody assumptions?

now the cat...just check out these awesome pictures:-

the average donkey looks like chad micheal murray

2007-11-08T20:04:00.001+05:30

i came across this phenomenon recently...look at these two pictures:-

exhibit A. - Donkey:-

and...
exhibit B. - Chad:-

now look at their eyes...and you'll see what I'm talking about!!!

usb 3.0 emotion speed transfer review

2007-11-06T01:03:00.000+05:30

ok, about me at the moment:-
-in Gwalior
-thus, bored to the point of pulling my nails out with pliers just to entertain myself

let's get on with my strange views again,
now, it so happens that when ya like someone, you think "if only she/he....(actually let's use 'she', i don't like obliques)....knew how much i like her"

how does that work? and why should it work? I'd think that if she knew exactly how much she liked me, and this information was transferred from my brain to hers through a high bandwidth cable, with no loss in translation...where there have to be no words woven to get the emotions across...she'd like me back, coz now she'd know exactly the extent of my interest in her...and should that make make me 'irresistible' and 'un-rejectable'? think of it with a perverse empathy...if some strange girl who i don't give two shits about and am not the least bit interested in comes and 'opens her heart' to me and lets me know how she adores me (please, this is a hypothesis, so try to imagine :-P) and how she can't sleep thinking about me...and stalks me on facebook...and collects pictures of me from people's phones...and other creepy things...would all this actually make me stop thinking about other people and fixate me on her? absolutely not!! I'd probably get creeped out and somehow reject her and eventually brag to my friends about 'how this random chick was crazy about me' (that's how the sick male mind actually works) i dunno what would the girl's position be, probably embarrassed...whatever. ('whatever' is all i can come up with when trying to think of the girl's position, proving that my theory about 'hardwire feelings transfer' wouldn't work, sometimes words do come close to the hypothetical transfer)

so...should a person keep hoping that someday the girl "will understand how i feel"???

how much ever you like a person you still...can't...change...their...mind.

let's keep hanging on for some lame miracles though i guess :-P

Optimism!!!

btw i was listening to this song 'illegal' by shakira, now, is the line "you said you would love me until you die, and as far as i know you're still alive" just sappy, or is it also mildly 'humorously sarcastic' :-P ? *snicker snicker* heehee

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Now playing: Radiohead - Paranoid Android
via FoxyTunes

we are all made of opinions (why did moby think it was 'stars'??)

2007-10-18T20:08:00.000+05:30

I'm semi-aimless and happy (kinda) today :) seen some changes in people,good changes, not too much to my advantage but still :) besides that I've made some more sucky 'vicious circle' type observations....

I've noticed that during exam time, some mutual 'study groups' are always formed, some by begging a person better at a subject, and some just out of of mutual understanding...and during this course...there is so much lying and conniving going on it's mind boggling, one group would lie to an individual or individuals about their whereabouts and study timings so that the individual(s) do not come and interrupt their studies by 'showing up' and disturbing them.....so many of us 'individuals' are left out roaming like idiots because of our reputation...i mean, it would be fine if we were just honest with each other, but that doesn't really happen, and would be kind of awkward if it did, not many people can pull of such coldness, hehe...and don't get me wrong, I'm not blaming anyone, because sometimes I'm part of the..er..'group' too ;-) so it is indeed, a vicious circle...so you see, we're all part of the 'world' as they say, and it's ways penetrate the best of us...we're usually not left any choice, gotta do this for the greater good...

now, the other thing, i had been showering at a friend's place because the 'bath system' at my tiny temporary disgusting apartment sucks, cold water, no 'shower' and a cramped environment...and that guy let me, he did express some dislike when he thought our boxers got mixed up (they didn't,it was a funny misunderstanding) and even more when i slipped and fell on his sink, breaking it in the process (not even his, his roommate's) so the next time i showed u at his place (by now i had taken it for granted that he 'doesn't mind') he told me pretty diplomatically that it was 'enough' and stuff and he doesn't want me to take bath there anymore...so, i was kind a disappointed but not upset, coz it was ok, it wasn't exactly a necessity, i was just doing it coz i could...so, it was good that said friend gathered up the balls to tell me not to :) saying 'no' is an important skill...i don't exactly look like a person people want to deny stuff (i really don't mind though, like another friend almost very correctly said, i hardly get upset!!)people are always trying to be diplomatic, and this too is another vicious circle and again i sound like a hypocrite because even i cannot say no to people...life would be much easier if i could, I'm just trying to survive in this world man, cut me some slack (everybody deserves to be cut some slack, but we all suck at that too) im not a saint, but neither is anybody else...there are so many needs of the world you have to fulfill, you have to be helpful, borderline empathic (they all expect you to show oodles of empathy, but they show a bare minimum of it themselves) and 'normal' enough for the world to accept you, if i could, i would shun all 'extra' obligations and friends, sit at home (my nice new 'private' home, not the one with the roommates)...eat..sleep...come only for classes....and communicate only via facebook or something...but that's how 'social life' takes you away from this awkward stunted vision...you want to come around after college, listen to bullshit spoken by people...gotta see certain people...need the company of some people you like and people you have become too used to, indulge in certain activities that are entertaining (movies, gaming)...you gotta somehow have good clothes and also figure out a way to wear them well so that the world doesn't call you an 'uncivilized freak', some people are able to carry of that look, me too sometimes, but it's nice to dress slightly attractively sometimes :) makes ya feel nice...why? because you know it's raising people's opinion of you, we're all made of other people's opinions at the end of the day.....

random thought: do you need, all that companionship that you're all so proud to have?? "ooh i have so many friends, they love me so much" are you really proud of all our friends?? or are most of them there just to passively use you while you're under the impression of 'being cared for'...?? ?

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Now playing: Yeah yeah yeahs - They don't love you like I love you
via FoxyTunes

deep and meaningless

2007-10-17T20:06:00.000+05:30

exam time could easily be the most boring ever...usually you give someone a call and go for dinner or meet up for coffee or something (this sounds terribly similar to a casual date with someone of the opposite sex but sadly, it isn't, I'm referring to my male friends).

now during 'exam time', every minute spent outside having even the quintessential 'dinner' seems full of some kind of guilt...not heavy guilt, just a feeling of "fuck, we should be back home studying"

it's not like I'm so social a person that i can't live without going out with my friends and eating, but it's become part of my routine and not exactly avoidable (I'm not heavily inclined to avoid my friends either)

before i switch to my "hmmm, what should i write today?" mode...I'd like to say something about my last post....in no way was i undermining the obvious 'talent' of the people who can just somehow make every phrase in a set of phrases rhyme with the one above... (how in the name of the devil does one do that?)

writing angry and dark lyrics seems like a great way to 'let stuff out', now that, is something everyone is always trying to do even more than the 'romantic' ones...it's usually something on the lines of 'hate', 'being ignored' and 'suffering', well...not everyone is in love, so somebody has to write about these too, which some feel more than others, and more than other emotions...

ok, now, i don't have much to write about...had some thoughts, they've kinda managed to sip my mind, Grrrr.....

i just realized that facebook can be really really addictive...the best place to stalk someone, hehe...i dunno why they generalize 'stalkers', everyone, is always, stalking somebody or the other...there is always someone you wanna know more about...and will do all the simple simple un-extreme things you can anonymously do..to do just that!! snooping/stalking is a pretty fun activity, everyone does it, we're all a bit curious and a bit perverted...and the internet facilitates it anyways...it's a boring life, gotta have some adventure and stupid pointless entertaining fun around here ;) i don't see anybody with the 'perfect life' here...nobody who you ca be jealous of, we're all losers at different levels..and it's all cool this way :) ah, beautiful beautiful cruel merciless world...what would we do without the little quirks in all you humans....

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Now playing: Rooster - You're So Right For Me
via FoxyTunes

random thought: you realize it's so hard to find someone you can completely completely trust?? and that it actually is so much better this way????

"aren't we all great writers?"

2007-10-16T18:57:00.000+05:30

"aren't we all great writers?" this was my msn nick sometime ago (maybe still is,will have to check)

when i look at song lyrics, or poems, or read one of these strange books with a million metaphors being used for explaining something as simple as "it was a monsoon day, and (duh) it was raining in so and so village" i feel intimidated...i mean, not anymore...ok let's change the topic.

song lyrics and poems (let's stick to these) are usually so well written, the romantic words (i guess it's understood by now that im not talking about death metal lyrics here) the splattering of feelings across the world's eyes...and it seems like this display of talent, but it's much more than that, the person writing these lyrics, is totally opening up his/her heart for all to see, not everyone can do that...maybe i have feelings inside me more intense than those of the song im listening to, but can i build-up the courage to put them out to the world? isn't every boy of my age trying to build up a strong,manly image for the world to see?? the writers and the poets are considered 'sensitive men'. i think they're the strong ones...all us others don't have the balls to let the world know the degree of our feelings, that we care, about other things than all things sexual....everything is inherently cheesy if it involves the 'L' word (referring to 'Love' here) note: this discussion isn't applicable only to the boys, but people in general...

for people who know me, i know i know i sound like a hypocrite because i find almost everything cheesy, but cmon, cut me some slack here....somethings are way too cheesy to be 'romantic' from any angle except the bollywood one!!

recently I've come across some words written by a couple of friends, something scribbled at the back of a notebook....something floating around as a note on facebook...something blogged away at an unknown link....i feel for these people. the secret writer's misery is even worse than the song lyrics writer...somethings can't be put in words, even more impossible is to put these things in rhymes, but for those who manage it and can let someone read it. hats off...you got balls. i feel intensely, but the last thing i would want to do is complicate my life by putting my feelings 'out there', this blog might be a nice place to let stuff out..but not everything :) some words are best left unspoken....

if i ever triad to write a song, poem or something...I'd probably not get a word out out of my fear of mockery...it's a sad, sad world. you can't care 'zero' about it. people suck, gotta deal with it...

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Now playing: The Perishers - Weekends
via FoxyTunes

not much to say, got much to do......

2007-10-13T03:11:00.000+05:30

often we get a sort of 'negative vibe' from people and wonder- "what's wrong, did i do something that he/she doesn't like but isn't telling me? why don't these assholes come out with it huh? why be cowards and hide their true opinion of me? why doesn't he/she rise up to the challenge, confront me and tell me what he/she thinks of me??"

now, have you ever stopped and wondered, would you ever do the same?? would you just go confront your close friends and tell them that they're annoying and wish did not exist at times? the answer is no... (in most cases, unless you're feeling mean,hehe, but jokes apart...) we have learned to live with all our friends' flaws and are cool with it, can't expect my friend to be like, not an asshole at all, at times everyone's allowed to be a prick...it's entertaining :)and keeps the spontaneity in the group...some people who are way too perfect are disliked too...in the "what did this person learn in his earlier years?? how can he/she be/act so naive??" stuff like that....sometimes you learn to adore a person's flaws..but we're not gonna discuss that..er...also to be clear, this isn't exactly a discussion forum,just a blog :)

in other news, me and two of my non-smoking friend(s) were feeling bored and making statements like "man i wish we guys had something for pure timepass like these smokers, something non addictive, not harmful for health,and enjoyable" and so we set out to try these ultra low tobacco/nicotine (apparently flavored?) cigarettes called gudang garam now these were supposed to taste/feel like cloves and such, but it was such a horrible experience!! why do people smoke anything??i hate the feeling of smoke on me...my hands smelled weird after trying it....lame...stale smell...i would never be able to make out with someone who smelled like smoke (one of my friends shares this opinion of mine)!!!

so it was a bad experience, all we did was crib about cigarettes and smokers the rest of the night....

in even more recent news, me and three of my friends, on two bikes went to this beautiful amazing heavenly place in some hills some kilometers behind his house...and had an awesome time there :) there we indulged in some cool exhilarating off-roading 'exercises' on our bikes, checked out some fun obstacle course things,we even followed a stream to reach a hidden-ish waterfall, had a great time overall...will be going there with more people again some time later...

nothing much going on besides all this....going on....living in a world with flaws like it has taught us to...it's all pretty uphill. bah!!! i need to see a goodmovie, 'next' sucked, bad animation,sucky story,dumb acting....

'the brave one' is the only good movie I've seen this month....thoroughly impressed.

'bhool bhulaiya' had it's humorous moments, but otherwise was a drag

'feast of love' was entertaining,but pretty predictable....i liked it anyways :)

I've been pretty happy happy this month, there is this song called 'into yesterday' by 'sugar ray' that's so uplifting....really nice. have been going on more of my late night musical walks, and have been really enjoying them too. also have had some temper losses during the month, but anyways, my temper is very short lived like always, so i can barely remember anything to write about these..'angry' events....

im slowly finishing off long overdue chores from my to-do list, preparing to finally shift out of this hell-hole and into my new house...which im gonna so enjoy living in, ah....even thinking about it makes me crave that life, damn....

random thought:-
it's hard to move on in life when the feelings at the 'back of your head' are like a ten tonne anchor telling you "yeah right, go ahead, you couldn't win here, what you gonna do elsewhere?" in these situations is it still the 'back' of your head?? or a dominating mutated obsessive overall brain disorder egging you to take drastic measures??

2007-09-16T01:32:00.000+05:30

The last few days have been quite a lot of fun, went for a great concert. Had a lot of fun. Learned some lessons. I'm living with anleey and Sam (sam sundar, our senior) in a tiny apartment (hah! Apartment) an d it sucks :( I mean, I like friends coming over and stuff, but what happened to my old life? In my aundh house….I had alone time, privacy, and a kinda homely environment….I'm not very much into the 'decorating the home' thing but I miss my home nevertheless :(
most probably I'll be shifting into my new apartment in October, I pray it doesn't get delayed.

I severely miss my home and a good night's sleep, and good meals. I feel like wild animal taken out of his natural habitat for too long!! There are way too many social activities I'm indulging in, enjoyable, but not very fulfilling, they're very (BLANK) it's like I'm stuck in the same routine whatever I do, a loop. College-eat-game-sleep-eat-gym-eat-sleep ARRGH!!! Actually I think the gym is the only good thing about the routine, and yeah college too, hehe. I used to attend all classes In the first semester around. I'm sounding very pathetic right now and totally contradicting my apparently 'adventurous' and 'always up for anything' attitude but I couldn't be more honest. My independence is gone (except when I go on solitary trips to other cities) also my bike is always with someone else, I seem to have a problem saying no to people, I mean I want to help, and don't mind sacrificing my use of the bike, but not all the time!!! And why me?

Where is my alone time? Where are my singular self-affecting impulsive decisions? And the activities I used to indulge in that affected only me? Which I only wrote about in this blog :( I think my impulsive decisions now come only from a subconscious need for deviation from the routine…but I don't exactly hate routines..hmmm…my routine when I lived alone was sadder, but I think I was happier :( when with roommates, I can't listen to those gay-ass songs I used to listen to all the time when I was living alone :-)

And I also want these poor cats to be treated and fed better…which only I can provide in my new house…I think. I want to sit in my balcony, sipping iced tea, reading a book(which I used to do frequently when I lived alone, the reading, and the tea, both) staring at the weird view (which is going to be only a building being constructed across the compound around the time I shift in, but whatever) and get away from the position of being so close to college, and things…and people….I like, and indulge(or try my best to) in way too much.

Life is pretty much stuck, not good stuck, bad stuck, I don't care, but I worry. I want to just go ahead and do certain things that I want to do…but can't. it is unexplainable. Voids and cycles are better than dead ends. But dead ends have a sweet finality to them. Which you can move on from…

I just got a new phone btw (now coming back to the 'this blog is about a stupid teenagers rants about overly usual stuff' - mode) it's pretty nice…a nokia 5500…

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Now playing: Bullet for My Valentine - All These Things I Hate
via FoxyTunes

Grrrr....slightly

2007-06-27T18:05:00.000+05:30

ok, this is, an impulse post...by that i mean, that i didn't think of anything to write before i started writing this. so what can i possibly write about? im feeling a bit shitty right now, kinda my own doing. (a lot shitty actually)

and, home isn't very inviting anymore...it doesn't seem, homely...yet...much.

im just biding my time, waiting for a better hour (bullshit way of saying, im not very happy, but am very optimistic about being so in the future)

indulging in songs by 'ben kweller' and this song called 'forever young' by 'youth group', forever young, is just awesome (i think its a cover of a old abba song but im not sure)..love the lyrics, music, everything.

im just, kinda sad :( at the moment...gonna take refuge in my big headphones and the great healer and friend...hah, 'friend', i've always disregarded the word...truth is, all friends are temporary...the only good ones are those you don't have to keep getting constant assurances from to be sure that they still like ya, the ones you talk to the least, and still don't feel fucking guilty. the ones you don't have any fucking awkwardness talking about anything ever. 'friends', are overrated.

Also, many times, I'm way too diplomatic (it doesn't show) for my own sake…I don't want everyone to feel great, no I don't, but this fucking automatic reflexive diplomacy fuck it all up. I don't want extra friends, they're a liability.

And yes, I hate those people who start clinging to you just coz you say a few nice words to em….super liabilities and irritations. many of them too naïve to 'tell off'.

another monthly (or slightly off) post...and yeah, MAC+PC marriage???

2007-06-09T05:11:00.000+05:30

first of all, forgive the new 'look' of the blog, i hate it too...it's like im pretending to be one of those 'minimalistics' and that too with some sad ad-ish links up there..i'll change it back to the same thing again, and maybe with the help of lemonade, into something totally awesome :)

since my last post (currently looking at my blog to see when that was) ah, now, let's start over...since my last post many things have happened which provoked me to write about them...some of them were:-

- the wild crazy/fun night with vihan,anurag,tanmay and achintya (no, there wasn't any sex involved)
- the trip to mahabaleshwar. with vihan,anurag, and landry...tanmay couldn't make it (actually a lot of the people who were supposed to come couldn't make it, arseholes)
- me getting utterly bored in gwalior
- oh yeah, how could i possibly forget? the mighty crash of my 400 gb harddisk :( it was a tragedy beyond words (even my bro's harddisk kinda crashed, but he recovered the data)
- my oh so lovely installation of windows vista which is so sexy i could just hump it
- my carrying the kittens in my gym bag to avanti's house :) (not exactly a legendary event but it was very 'unique')
- my viewing of the utterly overrated and pathetic movie "a beautiful mind" (what was so beautiful about his mind?? he was a complete whacko!!! like a snot nosed 10 year old kid who imagines that he is a G.I.Joe,weak,lame,Pfff)
- Cancellation of my plans to go to delhi, this really sucked...royally, i could have met my completely crazy comrade peu. well, whatever. guess i was destined to be bored and deprived these vacations...

but now, the thing that totally shook me up, the super shock, was the fact that the only way i could make my brother's macbook pro connect to the internet was through a windows PC!! i mean, this throws everything i know down the ditch, WTF!!!!

the wireless on the mac would detect our home wireless network, but not connect to it whatever i did, i tried different security levels, totally zero security, different authentication settings, manual DNS and IP etc. entry..nothing worked, then i tried connecting the Laptop to our router through the RJ-45 patch cable, and the router wouldn't even acknowledge a device connected to it...and then, out of a desperate hope, i connected the macbook to my laptop,the one with with windows vista ultimate on it and ICS (Internet Connection Sharing) enabled, and withing seconds, the mac was accessing the internet!! i mean, what the bloody fuck man!! this was like, blasphemy!! total crazy shit.....

the route for the mac to the internet was this(solid lines being wires, dotted ones being wireless)

Mac____cross cable______my laptop= = = =wi-fi= = = =Router____DSL line________Internet

truly amazed man, seriously, the apple people are fed up trying to help us, now tomorrow when i tell that guy all my problems for now are solved, they would be surprised that this method helped us :)

ok maybe i've ranted too much about this and some geek might want to correct me with a "dude, where have you been? i knew about this since ages" (well, as nobody visits my blog i probably won't get such a message, but still) sorry dude, i've not been much into the Mac thing...

sorry about not elaborating on the previously mentioned 'potential post topics' but here's a little bit, windows vista is awesome looks great, and has the option i alway s wanted of being able to access another the files of another user on the same computer by putting in his/her password....the mahabaleshwar trip was great, even with only 4 people!! just awesome, broke my slipper just outside mahabaleshwar as we were climbing into some wilderness where these guys wanted to drink beer, and thus had to ride my bike to panchgani barefoot :) it was kinda hard coz it was a hot day and at traffic stops it was hard to put my foot down, was constantly 'ooh' 'aah' 'ouch'-ing and rocking the bike from side to side, hehe...funny sight for fellow motorists...pictures here and here.

i also have been playing 'god of war 2' on my friend's PS2, awesome game, really good...now i wish i had a PS2...also i fixed up my PSP with this great new custom firmware which lets me use all homebrew and the awesome new features of firmware 3.03 :) also i can now convert and run PS1 games on the PSP, run great...also a friend of mine bought a PS3, and seeing the hacking possibilities of the same on PS3-hacks.com i seriously wish i had one :( not for games, just for all this shit :)

i also saw the movie 'lords of dogtown', really nice movie, so fulfilling, i love movies like this....

and yeah one more thing, i was watching garden state and heard this song in the end in Imogen Heap's voice, and thought "that's funny, i have all her good songs, besides this, and this sounds pretty good" and then i waited for the credits to roll and it hit me, Imogen heap was in Frou Frou!! no wonder i was missing out on this awesome music...ok, Frou Frou discography, here i come!!!

injustice, kittens (finally!!), and loads of multiplayer gaming.

2007-05-01T23:59:00.000+05:30

alrite then, lemme start

16th April - my exams started, gave one, and went to ishaan's place to study for the next one (17th) , on the way back (actually just dropping anleey) i was on my bike, another bike, with a woman at the back and her son driving it, stopped/slowed on the side, we kept on going and as we came behind it on the right, they turned into our way and BLAM!! after this impact my bike also hit another bike...anleey and me were on the ground all scraped up...and kinda hazy and stuff, and all these people started surrounding us, apparently some people had already taken the injured woman to the hospital...and while i woke up asking "what happened?" everyone was getting hostile around me, as if it was my fault, people shoving me and anleey around...treating us like criminals, when all i wanted to do was go home..and i had full right to, lemme make this clear, there is nothing about this accident that i regret...it was totally their fault. now as we were forced to go to the hospital (we cooperated so as to not create a scene, and as they had told me about the woman going to the hospital i was concerned) i realised that there was going to be no justice, and no truth, in this situation. i was being screamed at by every bloody person except one or two people who were actually listening to me and helping me out, one of these guys said to me "the woman had spondilitis, so it is even more serious, right now just tolerate their accusations else they'll become aggressive" well, i listened, spoke minimally, and hoped for the best...and felt extremely violated at the same time, the woman had multiple fractures in her right arm, a shoulder dislocation, and had to get stitches on her head. the policeman came and took my statement...which was the exact truth..and their accusation "we were going slowly because my mother has a back problem, and these people came at a speed of 80-90 kmph and hit us from behind!!" (on law college road? in traffic at 11 p.m? are you kidding me?)well, then the elder son (the one not driving) comes to me, yells a bit more, accuses even more, and says "i won't do a police case if you pay the hospital bills" and i agreed (at this point i should have called me father, but stupidly, felt a bit scared). but i knew my father would handle it, and also felt that i might get some justice, in a way. so i went home, with my bike keys, papers, and my license (which i had given to the police) now in the custody of the son of that woman (whose husband had now arrived too).
these people had come to an arrangement with the police, to let me go give my exams (which i had mentioned to them earlier) because i had agreed to give them the money, and anyway they had my signed statement and could do the police case anytime, i was kinda relieved coz the police case seemed like a big hassle and troublesome. dhriv and sarjeet had arrived and had convinced them to do this...so i went home, took care of my wounds and went to sleep...next day i wake up and call my dad and explain the situation, now my dad, after the initial scolding about not calling him right away, told me to tell them to go ahead with the police case. i was like HUH? then he explained to me that if they went ahead with the police case, as it was not my fault i would just have to plead 'not guilty' in the court and my bike's third party insurance would pay for the damages (hospital bills) so i thought 'ok' and went on with my life.....

now a couple of days later with a friend of my dad's who had come to help me out with the situation (all this time my bike was with them) we go to them and tell them that the insurance thing will cover their bills...and then they started screaming at me you're drifting away from your promise!! you said you would pay the bills!! i mean, how hard is it to understand that you will get the money anyways?? maybe even more!! just not directly from my pocket...and anyway (this wasn't even mentioned to them once, you had to be there to get why) it was not my fault!! damned people.

so after a lot of arguing and a lot of we don't want your insurance! we don't want to get involved in a police case! give us our damn money! my dad agreed to pay their bills in cash...directly...and it was a significant amount, and i was pissed about it, very.

26th April they finally gave my bike...and guess what?? the rear view mirrors, and the battery...were gone. disappeared, and the petrol was all gone too...with the pipe disconnected....

this was the worst luck, and the worst form of injustice, i have been a victim of, so far.

now on to the kittens :-)

we (me and anleey) recently got these two kittens

pictureshere

really cute and fun, and easy to take care of. pretty stupid though...shake one's tail in front of him, and it grabs it like a predator, wtf?

also, us guys (me,dhriv,ishan,anleey,rupin,revant etc) have been playing worms (like always) and counterstrike a lot lately, i basically suck at it..but have become slightly better :-) in a certain level i took a magnum (powerful sniper) once and did not die until they changed the map, survived many, many rounds and eliminated the opposing team :-) that was some luck, i think.

anyway, it's been fun, and sad, these last days of April...and i will be all alone for most of may (till around 16th) lets make the nest of it, at least i have the kittens with me :-) for whom we are looking for a place coz i have to go home for a bout a month and can't take them with me coz im not going directly to gwalior...and yeah, they are anleey's kittens (kinda,technically,damn,not really, no yeah,er...) and he can't take them to Dubai with him either...

OK, lets pray for more animal adventures and less bike accidents :-)

and of yeah!! i forgot to mention o went for this great concert in mumbai, a launch concert for an annual un-metal music compilation CD, amazing concert...totally worth the long trip :-) great bands..great music...great sound setup...also met rakshit and hitesh, was back in less than 24 hours.

the cats by the way, are really active, i could make a separate blog about their activities...

oh also, i made a seperate blog for the kittens here :-)

this desperately needed a title...still does

2007-04-12T01:33:00.000+05:30

"Ever had the feeling that you need to be totally alone?? Totally away from all your imperfect extremely flawed pretentious fucked up friends?? There has/have been only one or two people in my life who I've truly enjoyed being with in every shitty situation."

this was in my 'drafts' don't remember why..i change my mind too often :-)

well this is gonna be another nonsensical post...about routine stuff gone wrong.
i've killed a lot of cockroaches, a week ago, and my maid still isn't here to clean em up,Grrrrrr....

also, my bournvita (thing you add to milk to make it 'chocolate milk',-ish) was getting over...so...i bought this new drink called 'boost', mainly because it had 'now more chocolaty!!' printed on it. and i liked that idea. it was a half Kg (500gm) packet. and so i threw the little bit of bournvita that was left (would have been good for two glasses) coz i was excited about this 'boost' thingy...and as i mixed it with the warm milk...took one sip and thought "oh my god i've ruined my life".

i'm never listening to advertisements again. sheesh...

besides that (i use these two words lot huh? 'besides that')

ok, besides that i re-visited my vampirefreaks account, and man this place is good...i've heard so much good music playing in people's players...good shit.

also hey!!! check out these two cool sites,here and here. take my word for em :-)

depression...entertainment!!!!

2007-03-29T20:39:00.000+05:30

I've been feeling kinda down lately, the aura is like dry dry bland bland, only thing keeping me like my usual jolly self is bash.org :-) oh how i love that site!! IRC itself isn't as much fun as this site though....Im a kinda misfit there i'd say...I like the new 'our song' sony ericsson ad. Shit bbc world looks so beautiful on my old tv screen, im sure it's an hd convert. I really don't know what is bringing me down so much...But anyway, most probably it's because life feels so stagnant when you're in college, the lives of the partygoers seems so lucrative and attractive.But, actually going to a club or party can be such torture...There is just so much you have to be, and so much you have to live up to....If you know what i mean. (you prolly stands for me here, coz nobody reads this blog except me methinks, i just like venting it here) i feel like traveling the world for a year, getting away from everyone i know, every bloody person...Just me and my iPod....Where i can totally forget every person i like, every person im getting sick of...And the people i should probably get over (quite a few, im NOT Talking about silly crushes,only) ah.....Depression, and there is nobody who can pull me out of it, i don't like talking to people about it..Just blogging. It's so personal-ish, yet blogging about it feels good. Every day seems like a conspiracy. There is a disconnection setting in. And for some reason, and this is unexplainable, i feel more geeky than ever...But there is a bright side to this (the disconnection)...I can get household work done.Kinda, not that i enjoy this brightness.

ok, this is a two day post, the text in the last paragraph was yesterday, today, im feeling better, Geekier!!! and entertained :-) coz me, anleey, rushil and prateek had a gala time playing a 4 player 'worms world party' game...man this game is awesome!!! exploding flying sheep, exploding old women, suicide bombing, punching people off cliffs into water....team based gameplay....homing exploding pigeons. Yeah!!! ok im off.gotta catch the preview show of 'last king of scotland'!!! hope they don't run out of tickets...

btw i typed this whole blog entry on my cellphone, coz sahil was using my comp..... a new height of geekiness!!!

monthly post, trips and accidents...

2007-03-22T01:48:00.000+05:30

alritey then,
where were we? my blog entries are becoming so infrequent, many times i have things on my mind but just procrastinate their posting..

now since my last post, the major stuff that has happened is the smashing in of anleey's face...and some similar but lesser injuries to ishan. the trip onwards from there to an amazing beach at divyagarh (if that is how you spell it) i had offered anleey my helmet when he got out of the car to sit on the bike, i think about this everyday :-( coz he didn't take it and it would have been so much better if he did, Grrr.... wish the laws regarding helmets were stricter, people should be charged 5000 bucks for not wearing helmets, it should be like using your headlight at night, totally necessary.

i've discovered (or rediscovered) Lily Allen's music...pretty damn good :-) also some music from artists like 'cute is what we aim for', 'boys like girls', 'gym class heroes','the red jumpsuit apparatus' and 'the midway state'...the o.c had been pretty irritating, though quite funny, of late..and it had a nice needed end, finally. 'cute is what we aim for' has such great lyrics that i can totally relate to.

watching prison break right now...and waiting for the parts of my bike to come so i can totally fix it up for once.the hero honda people are pretty slow in this sense, maybe coz it is a new bike...but they're really organized atleast.

the ride to divyagarh was really tiring...but nice :-) the two injured (anleey and ishan) really missed out on a lot..also the other guys who went back to the hospital with them. the trip consisted of loads of people, after the 5 ppl went back in godwin's car (the two injured, gdwin driving, dhriv and sahil accompanying) all us other tired bikers needed to rest around somewhere...so we decided to go on to the beach, which was almost 80 kilometres away!! and had some fun there...came back (lost rupin and shaima on the way back, some confusion, but they reached) it was a great trip aside from the casualties...it was great to see all the organization and responsibility everyone showed...these are the kinds of friend anyone would be proud to have :-) i don't know how, but i wish i could somehow prove to my parent's that i am in good company,hehe.

let's see.what else?? oh yeah we had gone to lonavala some time before this trip, approximately 20 hours....

i just found this sit, and it has the funniest shit ever!!
check this out-

an excerpt from a certain online conversation, found on bash.org:-

get up
get on up
get up
get on up
and DANCE
* nmp3bot dances :D-<
* nmp3bot dances :D|-<
* nmp3bot dances :D/-<
<[SA]HatfulOfHollow> i'm going to become rich and famous after i invent a device that allows you to stab people in the face over the internet

i've been laughing so much lately, uncontrollably!!

now i seriously have bloggers block...can't think of anything much to say. sike.

songs, movies and emotions.... (why did i add that last word???)

2007-02-17T23:25:00.000+05:30

okay, so i had to sing 'outside' by 'staind' at the unify 07 western vocals thingy and also 'last kiss' by 'pearl jam' with this other guy kushal, went pretty well :-) people seemed surprised to discover that i sing. it was fun, hehe. overall the whole event was great...i've shared pics and videos on facebook and my youtube account (kinda linked). a certain competing band covered 'hey jude' by 'the Beatles' which was so bloody amazing!!!

and today i saw three movies, here are some words on them:-

Music and lyrics - your typical romantic comedy, really liked it, drew barrymore is fucking cute...it was really really funny too!! had the grand ending type thing in it, really really good music...gonna get the soundtrack. worth a watch.hehe. i like these kind of movies.
Eklavya - visually stunning, good story, in a way, but personally i found it kinda boring, although it was kinda good that it had only one song....
Bridge to terabithia - now, this one i went in expecting a 'chronicles of narnia' type fantasy adventure, but it turned out to be pretty different, and way deeper than that...this isn't exactly a movie for kids, i dunno, but an adult would clearly see the beauty in it...of the children's imagination, blah blah etc. it had some really sad parts, really really sad....and yeah, if i was a kid who had come to see a fun movie, i would be mentally going "what the fuck??" (well not literally) or "yeh kya bakwaas hai!!" but as an adult which i kinda think i am, hehe....i really liked it....worth a watch...touching.

ok, this kinda ends it i guess...erm. life needs more events to be put up!!

and yeah, the videos:-

Outside -

last kiss -

New blog entry, for the sake of blogging…..

2007-02-14T01:26:00.001+05:30

Recently I've had to travel so much around everywhere for so many reasons…but it's not a problem, coz I've had to travel for the college, and the college is paying for the same :-)

I've been so apathetic lately…and it's good!!! Not being hung up on someone is great!! Why god why was I ever??? I've been having apartment troubles coz the building wants me evacuated :-D coz of me and my brother's 'antics', antics my ass, it was just some friends who came over and some misunderstandings by the society…weirdoes.

Went to see this French rock band recently…Merzhin. Amazing vocals, played really well, some exotic instruments…and a really good sound set-up. But as they were singing in French and we weren't getting a word we got frustrated and left early :-D good that the passes were free.

Also I attended CRI, campus rock idols recently, awesome show, some people played coldplay etc. too, pretty good, also, one punk-ish band played blink-182!! Their playing/vocals slightly sucked, but im glad they did play :-)

Also im in this street play that takes place tomorrow/today (14th feb 2007,evening), we've been practicing for so long, hope that it goes well :-)

Too many smileys, bah

I also got selected to sing for/in the host performance part of the western vocals thingy at our college fest, unify. Im singing 'outside' by 'staind' have been practicing heavily for it :-)

Recently Kalhan apparently lost his Discman at my place, the whole situation sucks :-( it's nowhere to be found, and I seriously feel bad for him…shit.

'title writers' block strikes again!!

2007-01-31T02:15:00.000+05:30

ok, gotta cover some stuff here...
namely:-

treks I've been going to
switch to facebook (hopefully permanent)
other random stuff that comes to my mind while i type this :-)

ok, recently we guys went on some fun treks, i really can't say much about them now coz i can't think of much, now. also before we started the trek (this was on 26th January, republic day) some kids on the road were selling little plastic flags. one of my friends bought all 10 of that kids wares, now, the kid started asking her to return some of the flags and let him also keep the money!! you know why??? coz these kids and their 'owners' are smart enough to figure out that on republic day all the people will feel very proud of themselves giving cash as alms to these 'poor flag sellers' on republic and will feel 'patriotic' as a result....but won't actually buy the flags coz it's 'cheesy' to put a flag on your car....it's so well thought up!! and fucked up!!

now i've totally shifted to facebook, have been to some 'interesting' gigs recently......many!! and yeah facebook rocks, really great and much better than orkut man. the integration is amazing!!! and the features too, unlimited photos, such a user friendly and fast picture upload system...really good.

besides this stuff the college fest is coming up, lets see what i can do (if anything at all) for the dramatics club....

and yeah, my blog sucks!!! im losing my 'charm'!! Grrrr........

back to my roots

2007-01-14T00:05:00.000+05:30

I've been listening to loads and loads of emo stuff of recent, and although i love all this music (snow patrol, fray, perishers, lifehouse) i was missing some pace, so after a long time im back to my roots.....of the ROCK that i love so much!!! kickstarted from a friend sending me 'sway' by 'coal chamber' (the roof, the roof,the roof is on fire, we don't need no water let the motherfucker burn, burn motherfucker, BURN!!) and then forwarded by hearing a certain vocalist practise/try the lines of 'aerials' by 'system of a down' now im back on the big rock for as much time as i need to be, hehe. also I've been indulging in the old 'red hot chili peppers' albums and loads and loads of nine inch nails, also due to that song sending friend (kalhan) great music man.

besides that their was a rock competition recently and our college's band came first!! there was some story behind this i suppose but i don't know it.

the song 'just like you imagined' by 'nine inch nails' is pure genius...amazing music.

today is my mom's, and her mom's birthday :-)
also i gave an English proficiency something test. pretty bullshit thing.

lyrics from sunspots (NINails):-
...Peel off our skin we're gonna burn what we were to the ground.
fuck in the fire and we'll spread all the ashes around
I wanna kill away the rest of what's left and I do
yes i do

She turns me on
She makes me real
I have to apologize
For the way I feel....

also went to this great concert on Thursday. don't remember much about the music but the moshing was fun, really fun!! my body still aches from then. i have passes to tomorrow's atif aslam (and some other idiot) concert, hopefully it will be good :-) am shit bored right now, kalhan and visham were supposed to come for some acoustic guitar recording but the bike broke down.....fucked up. in other news, our college fest (unify) is comin up and the preparations are starting, although nobody is even ready with a theme yet. multimedia assignments are hard man, its fun but its serious hard work. the drama club 'auditions' were there today, and i don't think i can do anything but comedy, damn. lets see...

da dum dum da dum dum, writing a blog post can be so boring and 'this-is-incomplete' feeling-ish. now what else can i put in here man??? oh yeah, maybe i should mention that some of my best fucking friends aren't in the same city as me and that royally sucks.....pune friends please don't develop a complex or sumthing ;-)

ok enough banter. im done. bah.

many many thingies!!

2007-01-05T00:15:00.000+05:30

ok, i haven't blogged since a long time, and peu getting off her arse to write a new post inspired me to make an entry (for those who don't know peu, god bless you)

now, things that have happened since the lat post, in short:-

mood indigo
two accidents on my bike
other things that might have been important but i forgot to put in this list, read on...

ok, after i got my bike, things went back to normal, except for little tiffs and misunderstandings amongst people around me. abhishek just keeps talkin to his girlfriend and it's kinda pissing off at times, but him shifting from the multimedia section to the banking section is just sad :-(

at mood indigo, life was totally different, lying around around the bonfire till late, the songs and games being played, the awesome live music, everything was great. the best parts for me in the last concert (Livewire) was when the y played the Rage against the machine songs (them clones) and the song 'yellow' by coldplay (Parikrama), all in all it was a great concert, got some bruises and cuts in the mosh pit, one guy even attempted to body surf, but fell on his arse after bout half a minute, guess ppl got bored of holding him up,hehe.

mood-i was 4 great, carefree, fun days, the IIT Bombay campus is huge, really huge. im definitely goin back next time :-)

the two accidents on my bike, well, both took place the same way, banking to the right and gravel (satanic pebbles left by the pune construction people) made the wheel slip. hardly got hurt, sahil was pretty badly hurt, nearly fainted.hehe. also saw babel the same night (31st), nice movie.

most of the time now I've just spent observing people, meeting some new people, getting to know etc etc. it's been a hard and boring month. life pretty much sucks overall, the 'nothing to do' feeling is still there, the new year depresses me. my tonsils are bothering me again. have been eating loads of sweet stuff recently. have to restart Gym and guitar class. maybe i'll take up drums.let's see....

now my bro has shifted to Bombay, so im alone in the 2 bedroom apartment, more place to run around :-) and now i can shift into the 'good' room with the balcony and the attached bathroom, or maybe just use the one i already have, but now i don't need to lock the doors and can thus listen to my music while showering, okay, dumb topic.

of recent, i have helped a couple of girls deliver cheesy lines to put off guys who were their 'friends' but wanted to be 'more than friends' ant hose line actually worked wonders on those people!! note:- actually i have been one of those pathetic guys once (i did ask a friend out, obviously fell flat on my face), how ironic, but i wouldn't buy the cheesy lines i write myself, hehe.

those lines were great, tailor made to the person's situation, covering every question put up...etc etc. im kinda proud of myself :-) i am the god of rejections (atleast helping people do em diplomatically)

besides all this im really re-smitten by rage against the machine now, and also have been trying to sing some stuff for the 'band', lets see where we reach. i also have to make achoic between guitars and drums, lets see.....

ok enough man, can't think of anything else to write in now.

noodles.

got my new bike, creative tendencies,

2006-12-06T02:48:00.000+05:30

okay, i picked up the bike yesterday...

i now own a CBZ xtreme (Finally!!!) and right now, its 2:36 a.m, the last one hour i've been riding my bike to its full capacity on the empty Pune roads, i managed to take it to 110 Kmph on the way home, pretty amazing experience.....lets see if it goes higher (i doubt that) although a friend of mine once told me that his bike becomes wobbly and hard to control at such high speeds, that didn't really happen with me, this thing was as stable as ever. he owns a pulsar.

this is the first performance type bike I've owned,i don't know much about bikes, my last one was a Yamaha RX135, which was amazing, in its own way ;-)

when i saw the first pictures of this bike, i was disappointed, but when i saw it, i realized that the pictures don;t do it justice, see it for yourself, it looks amazing. a real eye catcher. it was really worth the wait, otherwise i was gonna take an achiever.

also, today i bought some acrylic paints and brushes, tried painting my gym bag,and the bloody thing just kept on soaking the paint!! maybe i should just use fabric paint on old cotton tees, hehe.

random, drab

2006-12-02T00:46:00.000+05:30

the 2nd semester has started, an this is drab, drab drab drab, no classes worth talkin bout, we've been divided into two different sections and it sucks. in the 'nothing to do' days of the holidays me and sahil must have visited each and every possible eating joint around the college, and have had our respective share of stomach ailments ;-)

at the moment im in the loo, (for ppl who didn't know, i have a wireless network in my apartment) experimenting with yahoo widgets,and using Firefox 2.0,better and more stable than the 'new' internet explorer 7 which keeps getting on my nerves with its constant hanging...and the best part of Firefox 2.0 is the built in spell check, pretty nice.

i'll be gettin my new bike (Bright red CBZ xtreme) on Monday, finally ill be able to get rid of the Yamaha RX135, which is really fun to ride, but there is nothing else good about it at all...

today i saw the movie 'a good year' and really, its one of the best ones I've seen in a month (besides 'the departed', which was pretty nice too) also i saw 'little Manhattan' on dvd, which too, was an amazing movie, one of the best romantic comedies I've seen :-) sweet.

well, nowadays i don;t have much to write except for these drab events of my own life, which i try to make better and more rewarding, or at least, more eventful.

ok, here goes, a list of things that have happened, just like old times-

instinctively lit the burner under a plastic microwave plate with my lunch which i was supposed to put in the microwave for heating, now it has a hole in it.
got a new (refurbished piece of crap) nokia 6600 from the nokia people as a replacement for my malfunctioning n-gage QD
internet connection has been fixed (after 25 days, tata indicom ppl suck)
one of the Pune flyovers is finally operational
have been going regularly to the gym (abs, my new one)
coming back to healthy food as we finally have a new maid who has started cooking
got pimples bothering me again
developed a renewed hatred for the rain
saw some good movies, e.g- chocolat, shawshank redemption, etc.
im done.

The agony (comedy?) of the one-sided crush

2006-11-29T21:25:00.000+05:30

Ok, this is a topic I haven't touched in my blog, or anything, ever before.
But before I start let me make this clear that I am not experienced at all in relationships, I've had one 'excuse for a relationship', long distance too!! And that's bout it, and we hardly had anything in common, etc etc, blah blah, you really can’t envy me, it was hard and nerve wracking.

Now, every single person has a kind of one sided crush, or something, for a person they know, or don’t know (of ur one of the 'don’t know' people then please snap out of it, pretty faces don't mean anything, get to know em ppl) and it sucks, and im not talking about "you should let the person know" or "speak up before its too late" like those cheesy emails, if the person liked you, you would obviously know, but if the person views you as a friend (or worse still, a stranger!!, in which case u should stop being one) then its hard, coz you know the person likes you (hopefully hen she actually does, coz some people are really good at being 'polite') but not the way you like them. And by the way, if you think im being a bit too hard on the 'I like him/her but he/she doesn’t even know me' type of people, think about it, what would you ever talk to him/her about eventually if you can’t do that now? And what makes you think that as right now he/she isn't talking to you, they would want to later? You gotta at least befriend em, I think.

Also, one thing that scares me and im sure any other person in my position to death, is, that if i were dating that person, what would i have to do to keep the other person interested?? I hope I don’t have to do so much, I hope she/he doesn’t start being 'polite' eventually and break up out of 'boredom' or 'this is not working' as problems, 'not dating yet' seems more comfortable than a 'bad dating regime' if you think too much about it. the word 'dating', and not the word 'relationship', scares the shit out of me….not having an unlimited supply of money sucks!! (though I don't think it would make me feel soooo much better either, is this even relevant??)

im an emo person who has never actually been in a serious (or casual) relationship, and I know, that even if I did get into one, and it wasn’t with the gal I like, it would feel weird and fake-ish, coz it hardly has anything to do with making out or something, its more of the missing "man she couldn’t be more awesome, nobody compares to her" feeling you get, comparing the girl you want with the girl you have, being single isn't pathetic, its just the insecurity of the one slipping away by the minute, constantly eating up a perfectly normal, emotionally capable person... (I know the words "the one" are pukable, but think of it as simple English and not the shit they cook up in movies and novels,or maybe not)

Why most one-sided crushes are in fact, 'one sided' and usually 'anonymous' (except to really close friends) is because of the fear of your comfortable cocoon of anonymity or 'friendship' being taken away, coz if you are friends, and you try to ask her out, and she rejects ya!! you might get this awkwardness amongst you, and if ur a stranger, you might start getting intentionally avoided. The negatives are far less horrible in degree than the degree of happiness in the positive, but the degree of the risk exceeds everything , and there you go, vicious circle…

Well, all you can hope is that someday the gal/guy goes crazy and falls for you :-D or you could go ask em out (too bad if they're committed/spoken for) but usually for asking someone out you've gotta be very sure, or very stupid, and the 'very sure' feeling is like a myth (at least to me), but the very stupid (and you usually won't get her/him) is kinda common, fools falling for 'pretty faces' end up in this position. I'm so done with running after just pretty faces, id rather hang with someone who I cherish just being with than someone who just looks good on my arm. The attraction to the person you actually like elevates higher and higher as you get to know them better, and it has nothing to do with their looks.

I guess that's about all I can write about this situation, fantasies of great romances continue…..no I'm not being sarcastic or cynical, really.

justice is all we need, not peace, not food for everyone, just justice, everything else follows.

2006-11-05T01:07:00.000+05:30

ok, so here's the thing, i had a tiff with somebody on orkut, he claimed to be a big politician's grandson (im not naming anyone here coz its not supposed to be 'sensible' according to everyone in my family) and i was told to remove the minutes of the same from a community, that dude threatened me and stuff too, actually he had been sending irritating messages to someone close to me, and was a real loser about her not giving a damn bout him, and so i sent him some messages (scraps, in the orkut world) to knock some sense into him, and evry1 in my family got into a bunch, why?? coz i did something 'stupid' and 'dangerous' yeah so my family (my dad to be precise) is looking out for us, doesnt want us to get into trouble, and i appreciate him for that, but what bites me is that i had to take the 'sensible' decision, and not the right one. the world needs to be without fear, politician's offsprings get the power they don't deserve due to fear, im not saying that the involved politician was bad or doesnt deserve the power, its just that his grandson misuses the power he wasnt supposed to have in the first place, he doesnt scare me, but i really love my father (it doesnt show much, but i do, he's like a hero who rose up to be an awesomely honest self-made successful man unlike certain brothers of his) , and i can't put him through the worry, however miniscule.

its a sad sad state we live in, i know that if the person mentioned here reads this, he wud brag to his friends about how he 'scared' me, but we all know who's the loser here don't we??

i swear when i grow up and don't depend on my family, im gonna make em proud, and give the world the justice it needs, the jolt it needs, this fight never will end, there will always be the fixers and the believers, this is not a promise, its a guideline...to conquer fear you gotta let go, and although people think i "can't even live without my ipod" and according to my mother im a 'coward' and a 'fool' to be writing stuff on the internet and not having the guts to actually face the consequences and get bashed up, i can endure more than anyone can imagine.....

justice, sweet justice, sweet sweet justice is all we bloody need, everyone should get what they deserve, good or bad, in the right proportion, and the ones responsible for this 'distribution' are no-one but all of us on the streets, in the colleges, the guy on the scooter next to you at the traffic signal looking out for his family in a middle class home trying to stay out of trouble (this is not a reference to my family exactly), as a collective, there is no trouble,.and you don't succumb to fear, you breed fear. the regulators are our choice, our gift and only due to us, do they become our curse....

man im burning inside, its unexplainable.

over enthusiastic about nothing

2006-10-23T03:27:00.000+05:30

well,
diwali just got over, i always get excited that yes!! now we celebrate!! but.... there is this thing, the fireworks are pretty short-lived, and diwali has lost its charm for me, every time i blast a bomb, i think "why do i do this?" coz the aftermath is just discomfort, ringing ears, and loads of choking smoke.. btw i drove the car in traffic today :-) yay!! and after we reached the destination, the driver called up my dad and told him im not ready for it so i have to go to those empty lots at the trade fair grounds again :-(

some related pics:-

ok, actually unrelated, but this is a pic of snowy, our close friend's dog (actually he is the son of my bitch, we gave him/it to them). in this i was tempting him with a piece of gujia (diwali sweet, so you see, it is kinda related)

pretty obvious what the things above are....

from left:- me, surangana, priyank, my bro...

also, our school (little angels) had an alumni dinner, and i kinda shifted my pune return dates for that, and although i don't totally regret going to it, it wasnt all that great, i mean, i would love to spend time with my friends, mainly nishant and neda etc in a private get-together or something, im not really into big parties i guess, fun and really really close friends are what matter in the end man, they are the ones you hang out with and shit.... and that is cool and perfect, no need to make elaborate plans, organize something big, just call up and say "meet me here at this time" and reach there without questions, something like that....

pics related to that:-

now i know this looks confusing and stupid but some of the guys happened to land up on each other like this and i somehow landed up with this photo, pretty funny.

and besides this i don't really have too many interesting photos to put up here.......

now, about my current musical foray, im drowning in songs by 'the fray', 'nine inch nails','the afters','snow patrol',' and have kinda re-discovered lifehouse, earlier i was under the impression that theyre just another bubblegum pop band and used to listen to a couple of their songs e.g:- 'somewhere in between', 'hanging by a moment' and the hugely popular 'you and me', but now im excessively listening to them, they've got awesome awesome (and some of my favourite) lyrics and jason wade's singing voice and talent is unnnnmatched, really love em right now, especially the songs 'come back down', 'days go by', 'everything' , 'spin' , 'sick cycle carousel', 'everybody is someone', 'you belong to me' and "Blind" (i think i owe the 're-discovery' to yasmeen's mad raving about them,Hmmm.....)

and yeah, my school (LAHS) is losing class, man, i wonder why it is considered the best in the city!!!! everything is to do with competition and winning, everything is kiddish, while other schools make an adult out of you, these people kinda make u a mess, i don't know how to explain it, but, it isnt really as good as it seems, there is so much of a facade to the school it's as if its whole picture to the world is the 'awards' the children have been over stressed and over pampered to achieve....the achievers are over-pampered, the under-achievers are given the cold shoulder, its an all-singing, all-dancing freakshow!! the favouritism is soooooo bad, the behaviour of everyone soooooo cheesy, its as if it's not about student development, but development of the image of the school so that more students are caught in the deathtrap that the fake smiles in the advertisements made look like such an 'awesome place to send your child'....the posters of some of the competitions and plays etc arent even put up on the bulletin board because the school knows which the 'best' students for the competition are, and it sends the kids to the competitions, wins the competition, and the students are awarded during the assembly as ppl wonder "when did this happen???"

there, ive said enough, and please don't argue with me on this, you probably were one of the 'achievers' if you think the school 'absolutely rocks!!', sheesh, i used to be an 'achiever', but i never let it get to my head, ok so im overconfident sometimes, im sure that's coz of this school, obviously the ppl who run the school care about the students at some level, but taking pride in the number of awards isn't the way of showing it, because not everyone wins awards, but everyone is affected by the lack of attention..... ever seen a principal calling an underachieving student their 'favourite' here??? its always the award winners, the liked ones...

looks like i hadn't said enough ;-)

now i have.....

ok i end with two pictures, the front....

and the rear view....

from my new house!!!! (under construction)

cya later children.

Those Lonavala trip pictures i promised.....

2006-10-19T02:12:00.000+05:30

everyone grinning away for some reason :-)

awesome view of tiger valley.....

sepehr (from iran) with a camel out of all animals....

Me and sepehr...

all of us (the bikers) before we sped off back to pune...

all of us waiting at the train crossing...

Saumitra and an ecstatic karan...

organized crime

2006-10-18T16:59:00.000+05:30

hi there, im in gwalior right now, and just as i was getting on the train i witnessed such an awesomely huge act of corruption it makes me cringe, my Bro's friend had come to drop us both to the station, and as he was leaving, two men just caught hold of him and asked him to show his mobile phone to them, they showed their ID as government people....now, he showed them the phone, and they looked thru everything, and they found a pornographic clip in it (no surprise, who doesnt have them nowadays???) and they said - "this is a cybercrime, you will have to pay us about 10,000 fine, or atleast 5,000", they also checked my bro's phone but didnt get anything, now, we discussed it with him (our friend, inside the train, with the men waiting outside) and told him to not give them a penny (we know the law has nothing against accessing and creation of pornography where the participant is above 18 years of age:-http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_pornography_laws_by_region), and say that you want to talk to your dad and/or lawyer, so he went out, first tried to coax them into letting him go with simple pleas, and then, he told them - "ok, gimme my phone ill call my dad", so they said "won't your dad scold you???" so he said "yeah, maybe slap me a bit, but i have to give the money to the government don't i??" and so they reluctantly gave him the phone, and as he started dialing the number - "ok ok we'll let you go" they said, and then, sure as hell they did!!!

now, this shows clearly that these people were under the impression that our friend is a "delinquent-dad-fearing-rich-spoilt-kid" and that to keep this 'matter' away from his dad he will just give them the cash, this is high level corruption people, just demand to see your lawyer and these bastards piss their pants, they just play on emotions and the fear of ppl's 'reputation' being tossed, and cmon, our friend here is a bloody 26 year old bloke, not a kid.....

ok, besides that, this 'train' took me and my bro to gwalior, our home town, pretty uneventful train journey (how boring!!) now im home, the weather here is raw heat most of the time, some new shops have opened up in gwalior, and now my favourite fruit is available here, the majestic kiwi!!!! i just fixed up my year old guitar, and have been trying to 'online-teach' myself some basic chords etc. ill join proper classes in pune when i go back, one day i wanna play "you belong to me" by jason wade (of lifehouse) perfectly, one of my fav acoustic guitar songs, by now, ive achieved just the first few notes, self-learning guitar is hell!!! my nani (my mom's mom) is here too, and man, im so happy to see so much bloody food in the house!! in my pune apartment i had just tomatoes and those soup powders, but this place is stocked like anything, and as i entered my home, i fell in love with my plasma tv all over again (sigh) i was tellin my bro "just look at it, just look at that damn thing!!!" like a crazy person, its like a wierd fetish you know, you can never be truly happy without a plasma TV (My philosophy) first thing im buying when i start earning is one, hehe. i couldnt be more of a movie/TV buff, wish my dad would filthily spoil me and my bro, heehee, then we wud have a plasma in the apartment, ok, enough with the TV.

again, i have run out of things to say, as i said, uneventful = boring......

and yeah, apparently sepehr an mani are 'divorced' (had to enter a random stupid thing, gotta keep my blog interesting)

and yeah, not all my posts have to do with corruption, its just that corruption has to do with everything, so its kinda unavoidable sometimes.....

leave comments people.......

I Am Corrupt

2006-10-17T03:18:00.000+05:30

it has happened with me three times now, first two times, i entered a two-wheeler no entry area by mistake (yes, the same one, twice) and today, i entered a one-way road from the wrong side.now, the policemen, are supposed to fine me for Rs. 200 and give me a receipt, this way, the money goes to the state, and is used for whatever. but, these policemen are shrewd businessmen, they say "instead of paying 200 and going to the booth for a receipt, just give us 100 and leave"

now, anyone would choose the latter and give a 100 rupee note and rush off, that is what i did, and man, usually i forget things like this, but it still bites me, i saved 50% of my cash, but lost all peace of mind and dignity (yeah, i can't find a better word, and this pretty much sums it up)

its like, i had a choice, whether to honestly give 200 bucks to the government, or give 100 cash to the fat corrupt policeman (even the most respectable looking policemen do this shit), and i did the cowardly thing, the thing that every criminal does, easy way of making money, its like stealing from your country (this sounds lame too, but our country pretty much sucks because of the same reason), its like using money you weren't supposed to have...... it sucks!!! I'm not pointing any fingers at anyone who would want to just 'get out of there' coz that is exactly what i did, its just that (although I'm gonna try to see those little boards saying 'one way' or 'no-entry') if this happens to me again, I'm gonna slog their asses, tell them i wanna pay 200 bucks and get a fucking receipt, whatever my wallet sez, and whatever my 'criminal instinct' inclines me to do.... and by the way, the phrase "as if i will make a difference" does not make any sense, think about it.

ok, in other news, i haven't posted since a loooooong time, so, to sum up the events:-

went to the resurrection concert on 2nd oct
awesome concert, got interrupted by the cops though due to 'elevated noise levels on gandhi jayanti', demonic resurrection rock!!!
gave my IT Practicals, pulled all-nighters to complete the bloody assignments, got 94/100
went to the 'Rock syndrome' rock competition, my college (SICSR) won two out of 5 awards, best bassist and best drummer
Saw 'Rang de basanti' again at this film festival for free using prarthana's pass, that movie moves me every time, after seeing it, even the sleep at night seems different
felt sorry for yasmeen coz she hasn't seen the movie :-D (this is dumb, but is related ot the last item in the list and comes under 'current events' so..)
kinda realised that my bike has the worst mileage ever
wallowed in self pity (i don't remember why, but its like routine nowadays)
finally got a protective screen and removed the iPod's factory plastic thing.
started eating tomatoes out of the fridge coz we're out of fruits
lost like 10 kg's (thanks to yasmeen's weighing machine, i didn't have to go to the gym just for my weight) now im approximately 88
kinda worried about the ever there swelling and occasional pain in my foot (some ligament thing)
Gave my n-gage QD for repairs at the nokia service centre situated in the worst part of pune (think, pune's armpit) Swargate!!!
...................................er......yeah thats about it for now,ciao.